Important Communication Guidelines

There are times when we can get irritated with our friends, children, spouses, relatives, church members, or coworkers. When these irritations come, we can either resort to being nasty, rude, and abrasive, or we can endeavor to be gentle, courteous, and considerate. Here are a few guidelines to follow when you must communicate under stressful and irritating situations.

1. Be a good listener. Do not answer a person before he has stopped talking.
Proverbs 18:13 He that answereth a matter before he heareth it, it is folly and shame unto him.

2. Think before you speak.
Proverbs 15:23 A man hath joy by the answer of his mouth: and a word spoken in due season, how good is it!

3. Do not use silence on a person to show your anger or frustration with him. Explain the reason that you are angry or frustrated.
Colossians 4:6 Let your speech be alway with grace, seasoned with salt, that ye may know how ye ought to answer every man.

4. Do not become involved in quarrels.
Proverbs 20:3 It is an honour for a man to cease from strife: but every fool will be meddling.

5. Do not respond in uncontrolled anger.
Proverbs 15:1 A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger.

6. When you are wrong, admit your offence and ask forgiveness.
Proverbs 20:6 Most men will proclaim every one his own goodness: but a faithful man who can find?

7. When you do forgive someone, never bring the offence up to him again. Genuine forgiveness means: I won’t bring it up to that person again;I won’t bring it up to anyone else; and I won’t let my mind brood on it.
Colossians 3:13 Forbearing one another, and forgiving one another, if any man have a quarrel against any: even as Christ forgave you, so also do ye.

8. If someone verbally attacks, criticizes, or blames you, do not respond same way.
Romans 12:21 Be not overcome of evil, but overcome evil with good.

9. Try to understand the other person’s opinion.
1 Peter 3:9 Not rendering evil for evil, or railing for railing: but contrariwise blessing; knowing that ye are thereunto called, that ye should inherit a blessing.

10. Do not blame or criticize the other person. Try to encourage and edify the other person.
Galatians 6:1 Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted.